Fathers & Finances

I am really excited to write this blog post because we have never had a prompt for our blog posts before. This was a really cool and neat experience for me because I was able to do some of my own research and read articles about things we have talked about in class. The article I found a really like is called “Fathering in America: What’s a Dad Supposed to Do?” This article was written by Marie Hartwell-Walker. In this article Walker really dives in deep to what fathers roles and responsibilities should be. At first when I was reading this I felt like some of the things Walker was talking about were pretty basic Dad things that everyone should know. As I thought about it more I realized that for some people this may not be a basic Dad. So many people nowadays grow up in completely different family situations than the typical nuclear family. I feel so blessed and so lucky to have been able to grow up with a Mom and a Dad both being in the same home and a part of my life. The 5 main points I took from this article were: first be there, second respond to the needs of your kids not their mother, third do your financial share, fourth balance discipline with fun, and fifth be a role model of manhood. 

Be there. This one to me is pretty simple. Just show up! Go to their soccer games, be there at all the dance recitals, and never stop showing them your unconditional love and support. They just want to know you and spend time with you! No amount of money or job should ever come before those precious moments with your kids. That is time you will never be able to get back.

Respond to the needs of your kids not their mothers. This one is tricky to explain. What I am not trying to say is that you shouldn't treat your wife with respect. What I am trying to say is that in the situation of divorce you should still show your children’s mom respect and treat her with importance because your kids should never be in the situation of picking sides or having to hear you talk badly about their parent.

Do your financial share. Whether you are married and living together or not you should be supporting your kids at the very least. Kids should be fed, clothed, housed, and cared for. They will feel valued if you do those things and let them know how much you care for their well being. 

Balance discipline with fun. Dad’s tend to be the disciplinarian in the house but do let that be our only job. Your kid will grow up distant from you and afraid to come to you. Find a balance of having firm limits and expectations but also being able to let loose and have fun with your family.

Be a role model of manhood. This one is so important. Your kids will look up to you so much so the way you treat your wife is the way your kids are going to treat her and any other girl they date the same way. If you want your kids to grow up successful and a good man then be a good man yourself and show them the way. This is the same with your daughters. They will start dating boys that are like you so be the type of man you would want your daughter to marry. 

I have been very lucky and blessed because I have had a wonderful father who has always provided for my family. He always came to my soccer games and has always supported me in whatever adventure I want to take. He is truly the best and I will forever be my daddy’s little girl. I love you Dad!